I Don't want to be so Plain

  Do you ever just wish to be someone else, even for just a day. Or maybe just be different??? I know I certainly do. Now don't get me wrong, I love my children and my husband more than life itself. It's just some days, I don't feel like taking care of goats and being so plain, or even homeschooling. Some days I just want to do my hair, put make-up on and get my nails done, maybe even get a pedicure ( never had one but sure wish I could) I love tattoo's and some days...some days I feel really spunky and think, hmmm maybe a tongue ring!
  Ha, NO I'm not going to get my tongue pierced, not that in my opinion there is anything wrong with that. Maybe I has split personalities, some days I want to be a crunchy hippie momma and others, others I feel like being a plain skirt wearing momma, and some a tom-boy in yoga pants in a t-shirt. I feel I have fallen into the mommy look, you know plain top-if not a nursing shirt, jeans or a skirt, tennis shoes or flats, no make up and  undone hair.
  I am thirty years old now. I have seven children and have been with my husband for eleven and a half years. You would think I would know by now who I am. Well, I know who I am. I am a God fearing wife and mother. But I look around and most women are. They just are. They have a style and rarely sway from it. Sure they may dress up or down on an occasion, but they are predictable. Not me. I am so bored right now. I really do not think I have found the true "look" for me. I feel in my heart I am a spunky fun, corky, off kind of dresser, yet in my head I want to be classy and sophisticated, yet we live in a small town on a farm, neither seem very practical. Not to mention the fact, despite what I may say, I do care how others perceive me and I am a Christian so no matter how "cool" I think tattoo's are I obviously wouldn't get covered in them (no I do not think anything is wrong with tattoo's I have some) but I don't want to walk into church and have people stare, or be out in public with my children, having people think, wow that woman needs to grow up! My husband  says "who cares what everyone thinks, wear what you want to, look how you want" sometimes I feel like it's just not that easy. I mean I don't want to walk around in revealing, skimpy clothes, just more me funky clothes.
  I wish I had a large amount of money and an entire weekend to myself, well maybe with my mom or a girlfriend to just shop. Just try on everything, I mean I rarely get to try on anything. I am always with all of the kids, so I just grab and go if it's on sale. I need an entire wardrobe for every day of the week
;-) Aah the life a  confused mother. Maybe someday.